Gnaihs Gnak

Life is still going on

2011-04-25T15:48:00.003+08:00

Looking back to the previous photos recently,

I found that I had changed a lot..

miss all the moment we spent together...

miss all the days we studied in the same class..

I do appreciate all the happiness and hardship that we had undergone together..

yeah..everyone changed..it's not only me..

..life is still going on...

fight for your future...

this is just the beginning...

nothing to hide..

nothing to cheat..

"I miss you" is the fact

The Dead Crow

2011-04-17T15:27:00.003+08:00

I saw a dead crow in a drain

near the post office

I saw an old man

gasping for air

and a baby barely able to breath

in a morning crowded clinic

......

damn I forget what's next....

anyway..it's just a meaningless postXD

Give up?

2011-04-01T11:32:00.002+08:00

Just took my literacy test today...

sometimes I really feel like want to give up...

I dunno I still can stand for how long...

I hate the tests,

I hate quiz...

I hate everything that gives me a lot of stress...

actually I was not really happy last few days...

there is something that I dun wan to face...

I am doing something wrong...

something that will make me regret forever...

everything is getting worse..

Stand for another 3 months YKS...

you can do it...

I know it is tough but that is what you chose...

you deserve it...

who ask you to get into uni 1 year earlier than other?

and you...there is some problem between us...

something that we din solve it at the very beginning..

do we have future?

seriously i dunno...sometimes..it is quite confusing for me..

are you sure distance is not a problem for us?

Lonely New Year

2011-02-03T00:36:00.002+08:00

Today is a snowday..

but we have to stay in our own residence,

becoz the snow is too heavy...

T.T..

I already sick of the food here,

what the hell,

imagine you eat the same food everyday for 1 month,

damn~

I still have 6 months to go..

These fews week,

I was busying with all the university stuff..

damn stress..

Yaya...this is the first time I see snow and feel the winter,

so what?

I have to celebrate the Chinese New Year alone,

no relatives,

no friends,

and the most important point is...

NO ANGPAU!!!!

well...let's talk about my life in Canada,

Erm..actually nothing special here,

I live in the school residence called Pine Hall..

the internet connection here is really sucks..

I cant even sign in my msn using the stupid line here...

school?

nothing special...

I am taking Bio, Phy, Eng, and Add. Function...

still ok lar...not too bad also...

maths average 99% so far...XD

haha....

everyday i wake up at 7am...

sometimes 7.30...coz i am lazy..

anyway, the school bus reach here at 7.50..

and i take my breakfast at school everyday..

after that..the lesson start..

Oh ya...my school got 2 cafe..

one serves normal food,

another serves pizza, sushi, burger, french fried, hotdog..and..watever..i cant remember..

oh ya...and unlimited soft drink in both cafe...XD

erm...i school end at 4...and when i reach residence is already 4.30...

do my homework then dinner then revision then sleep...

that's my daily life in canada...

boring but simple..

haha...

but sometimes,

i really miss everything in Ba Zhong...

miss the prefect board,

miss Scout activities,

miss all my friends...

ok lar...time to take lunch...

take care lar guys^^

CCCAaaannnaaaddddadaaaa

2010-12-24T04:00:00.003+08:00

Lol..juz reach vancouver yesterday...
erm..for me it is not very cold but still have to wear a jacket lar...
haha...at least not as cold as i expect...muahaha
currently living with my bro..
after 1 week then i will fly to my own college..
lol...

drink some wine today...

hehe..since parent is not with us..

but of course not too much..hehe

and bought a new laptop today..

hehe...but quite expensive..lol..

i miss tawau..

i miss my parents..

and..

i miss all my friend..

Last..

2010-11-10T22:46:00.002+08:00

It seems like everything is going to end up..

at least that is how i feel now..

but I really appreciate everything I experience..

even Fuk Pak's tuition..

although I always trying to skip his class this year( it is impossible to skip his class=,=)

Tomorrow is the last day for us to study in the same classroom..

only 5 hour? I dun think it is enough..

I really hope it is endless..

lol..

2010-10-31T23:04:00.002+08:00

it is 11.04..

havent sleep

coz i am reading bio..

lol..

i found that sometimes the bio experiment is a bit funny and stupid..

relationship between urine output and water intake..

even a little child also knows its relationship..

procedure?

1. ask a person to drink a mug of water.

2. record the number times he visits the toilet.

I am not laughing at the question..but juz feel like..

why am i wasting my sleeping time..

to memorize such a stupid experiment..XD

UEC physics..

2010-10-18T21:59:00.002+08:00

give up?

yes..becoz it really difficult..

no..becoz this is the last UEC physics for me..XD

Few days ago..

2010-10-03T21:36:00.002+08:00

juz hav an annual meeting yesterday..

yeap..new committee is formed..

and it is the time for me to retire..

hurray!!

but actually..

i admit that i hav done nothing this year..

achievement?

haha..

oh ya..it is really surprising to know that..

during the King Scout exam..

one of us scored the highest mark

in the whole exam..

but the organiser din mention who is he..

haha..

anyway..proud to hear tat..XD

Chasing around..

juz like a kid..

how happy it is..

sometimes..did something..

that you think it is childish..

with friends..

it feels good..

Friend...

is someone who will lend you a hand..

when you are in trouble..

someone who always tell you the truth..

when you are wrong..

someone who goes through every hardship and joy..

with you..XD..

Sejarah..

2010-09-29T22:17:00.004+08:00

How revise that stupid subject..

so many to memorize..

sleepy when studying it..

haiz..

i hate to memorize..T.T

It is not easy to hate a person..

and it really tiring..

Headache again..T.T

2010-09-26T22:29:00.004+08:00

today is the fifth day liao...

wat happen to my head..

actually not very pain..but..

juz feel like something wrong..

i never experience something like this before de..

haiz..

sui bian lar..

dunno why..

suddenly feel that u are so childish..

maybe me too..

but anyway..

I am tired and not enough time for me liao..

preparing for the SPM then go out..

that is wat i have to do now..!!!!

Headache

2010-09-22T19:41:00.003+08:00

Walaower...what's wrong my head..

always headache in this month..

T.T

Strange

2010-09-06T23:02:00.002+08:00

What a strange day huh?

I still can't believe it..

How many people in our class..

How many flight she can choose..

How many seat are there..

OMG...

Evergreen ( Westlife )

2010-08-31T11:36:00.001+08:00

Eyes
Like a sunrise
Like a rainfall
Down my soul
And I wonder
I wonder why you look at me like that
What you're thinking
What's behind
Don't tell me
But it feels like love
I'm gonna take this moment
And make it last forever
I'm gonna give my heart away
And pray we'll stay together
Cause you're the one good reason
You're the only girl that I need
Cause you're more beautiful than I have ever seen
I'm gonna take this night
And make it Evergreen
Touch
Like a angel
Like velvet to my skin
And I wonder
Wonder why you wanna stay the night
What you're dreaming
What's behind
Don't tell me
But it feels like love
I'm gonna take this moment
And make it last forever
I'm gonna give my heart away
And pray we'll stay together
Cause you're the one good reason
You're the only girl that I need
Cause you're more beautiful than I have ever seen
I'm gonna take this night
And make it Evergreen
Don't tell me
But it feels like love
I'm gonna take this moment
And make it last forever
I'm gonna give my heart

D 9

2010-08-19T22:41:00.003+08:00

hiding from the rain and snow
rying to forget but i won't let go
looking at a crowded street
listening to my own heart beat
so many people
all around the world
tell me where do i find
someone like you girl
take me to your heart
take me to your soul
give me your hand before i'm old
show me what love is
haven't got a clue
show me that wonders can be true

they say nothing lasts forever
we're only here today
love is now or never
bring me far away
take me to your heart
take me to your soul

give me your hand and hold me

show me what love is
be my guiding star
it's easy take me to your heart

D 8

2010-08-16T22:31:00.003+08:00

Ok..good job..

i lost nothing..

but unfortunately..you lost a friend..

haha..

anyway..

Nid to be serious le..

I always tell myself about such thing..

but it never bring effect to me..

D 7

2010-08-04T22:54:00.002+08:00

I agree with it..

It is not you don't want to have it..

but you are planning to have it..

Now then I know more abt you..

D 6

2010-08-02T22:28:00.002+08:00

不够..

至少我是那么觉得..

我期待会更好..

但却没有时间了..

简单的一天..

又溜走了..

得加油了, 别的事就撇在一旁吧...

但这并不代表我放弃..

D 5

2010-08-01T22:41:00.003+08:00

omg..my hand is bleeding again,

a small wound but a lot of blood..

anyway..sudah biasa le...

sudah biasa melihat, mendengar, dan merasa...

sudah biasa menjadi watak begitu..

D 4

2010-07-28T22:19:00.002+08:00

What am I thinking..

I dun trust myself..

it's not real..

I can't forgive myself if I done something like this..

Although you already put it down..

But why..

you are just simply find someone to replace it..

everything is fake..

why am i acting like this..

I dun understand..

I can't control..

sorry if i hurt someone..

D 3

2010-07-26T21:21:00.002+08:00

Headache...

but tonight cant sleep earlier..

Whatever..

I know..

I am not tat lucky..

D 2

2010-07-26T00:07:00.005+08:00

No more time...

I keep reminding myself..

but...

I cant control myself..

I cant stand for those attraction..

I cant face it properly..

YKS

nothing is done..

face but not escape..

I really hate myself..

anyway, it does not belong to me...

D 1

2010-07-23T23:05:00.009+08:00

Haha..lucky day??

yeah...IELTS i got 6...

it's no very good...

coz i know i can get it better...

haha..watever

since this is the first time..

well..nothing special today..

haha

am i a spare tyre for u?

2010-07-21T23:34:00.007+08:00

useless...ing

really useless...c

disappointed..I hope it is real

What am i doing?

rubbish....

I hate myself..T.T

why i am so interested in it??

---

2010-07-03T22:59:00.003+08:00

我明白了，

但要怎么说出口，

更要怎么让你们了解？

我不忍心，

但又能做什么，

毕竟我

孤掌难鸣……

我了解你的性格，

满满的自信，

总是不容易动摇，

但你要知道，

跟你沟通有时真地不简单。

我也了解你，

你总是在别人离题时，

把人拉回来。

我要你的帮忙，

但是机会总是特别难找，

毕竟我发觉往往

和你沟通比较容易。

我曾经了解你，

随和的你总是为了团努力地奋斗，

随着岁月的增长你变得不一样了，

我很不了解你，

我甚至不想和你讨论任何东西。

不过算了吧，

水和火能够配合的天衣无缝，

当两者却永远不能融合吧！

我一直以来最了解的应该是你，

你最容易明白我想表达的东西，

但是，

除了但是还是但是，

一棵大树就算长得再高，

叶子一年比一年少，

到最后，

总是不完美，

不是我想的太多，

但这个是个事实。

奇迹不应该被等待，

而是应该被创造，

这不是第一次了……

我打了酱多无非是希望你们明白，

这或许是我为团做得最后一件事了，

我觉得累了，

我真的没有那种冲劲了，

也是时候

开始向左转了。

No Turning Back

2010-03-08T23:09:00.003+08:00

It is 11.30 now, and i wonder why i am still sitting in front of my laptop, typing a stupid blog..haha..tambahan pula tomorrow is the UEC Physics.. hope tomorrow will be better than today..shit!!! i am sure i will fail my add maths..really felt sorry to chen zhen...haha...actually when they are doing the revision of add maths...i din attend..haha..coz i am too tired after playing the volleyball...haha..watever...really hope that today is the last day of the exam.

For other people, thursday is the end of suffering, but for me is just the beginning..i nid to suffer for the whole month....and honestly it is really pressure to face the king scout exam...i am just scare of failing the exam..there is no turning back, the news has been published onto the newspaper..meaning to say the all of the people will know it...if we really fail it..where should we put our face..haiz...now my main problem is the log book...ma de...nid to burn the midnight oil for the next few week...watever..i just try my best and get all my concentration onto the king scout after the exam...

ok~phew....i think i should explain something to someone here...sorry for everything i did. Actually i purposely did it, and abt the reason..i think it is not the time for it...but i promise i will tell you as soon as possible....i know you understand wat am i talking abt de..haha...i think you wouldnt view this blog....but if unluckily you see it...then i juz wan to say sorry...agree wiv you.. people nid rest..

Nigel....Our memories...

2010-01-24T00:07:00.004+08:00

珍重再见...T.T

2010-01-18T21:24:00.003+08:00

今天，Ah Lo走了。我很不舍得……起初我以为我不会在乎，但是我错了。记得昨晚，我和他们去farewell Ah Lo. 其实我很早就知道他明天要走，但是我感觉上很像那天晚上才发觉他要走了。我开觉得不舍得。当天晚上，我没有很快入睡。我在想我们以前所经历的一切。记得我们一起去钟老师那里补习，天天惹老师打我们，很像越打就越爽酱，老师越是打我们，我们越是笑酱..aikz...记得我们六年级时，辅导班过后就去爬那个篮球架……爬了几次，最后终于被副校长发现，抓我们去骂。记得我们初一时，班长学长团合唱，我们约好不要去练习，结果表演当天，你运气好，选到的位子有人当着，而我和俊康就没有……结果唱到音不对嘴，被人家笑。记得我们爬神山时，一起到顶的那种喜悦。还有很多很多的回忆。

深厚友情不是几天几夜就可以造就的。刚开始我认为中学时期的我们最多只是普通朋友，因为我们各有各的喜好。但是我错了，当我在写我对你的感言时，我还以开玩笑的态度去告诉别人，如果我哭，不要笑我。但是当我真正拿起笔时，我才发觉我写完这篇东西过后，我们能在一起玩，颠的日子就完了。这时我的眼泪就留下来了，假变真。这也证明了这份友情对我的重要性。他不止是我的朋友，也是一起长大的玩伴。是这份友情陪着我成长。

其实我真的很不舍得，每个人都说以后会有机会见面，但是如果以后我真的去加拿大念书。我们就不可能见面了。你假期时，我上课。我假期时，你上课。读书，一读就整十年。十年后的事，没有一个人知道。未来，我们各有各自的路线。天下无不散之筵席，如果有缘就一定能再相见。接下来几年，我们无论在世界的哪一个角落，我相信我们都会有个共同点，那就是在为各自的目标拼搏。让我们一起加油吧！无论在世界的哪一个角落，只要有心，即使一个在天，一个在地，都有办法能心连心，继续这段友情。最后，我只有两句话：谢谢，保重!!!

2009-12-27T22:52:00.005+08:00

多心
有時候，你難免多心。心眼一多，對許多小事就跟著過敏。於是，別人多看你一眼，你便覺得他對你有敵意；別人少看你一眼，你又認定是他故意對你冷落。多心的人註定活得辛苦，因為情緒太容易被別人的情緒所左右。多心的人總東想西想胡思亂想，結果是困在一團思緒的亂麻中，動彈不得。有時候，與其多心，不如少根筋。

你是一塊磁鐵
相不相信？其實你是一塊磁鐵。當你身心愉稅、喜歡自己、對這個世界充滿善意，美好的東西就自然地被你所吸引。相反的，當你悲觀、鬱悶、覺得什麼都不對勁，負面的一切也就相繼來報到了。因為你是一塊磁鐵，吸引的是與你相關的東西，所以快樂的你就吸引讓你快樂的人事境，煩憂的你則吸引讓你煩憂的人事境。
幸運與厄運，在於你如何使用內在的磁力。這是信念的奧秘。

你今天心情好嗎？
你不說話，但眼底的神色已回答了一切。那麼，就別讓自己繼續躲在心事重重的甲殼裡吧。「煩腦」這種煩人的東西是想出來的啊，若是不想就不存在，
你沒聽過這句話嗎？去喝一杯咖啡，買一件衣服，剪一種新髮型。去吃一筒冰淇淋，走一條街，看一場電影。去看一個老朋友，聊一回往事，數一晚星星。
讓自已好過的方法很多，而且善待自己是道德的。除非，你堅持躲在潮濕的甲殼裡更快樂。

別太在意
他的吃相讓你討厭，但或許你說話的樣子也令他不悅。你不喜歡他穿衣的風格，說不定他也受不了你的髮型。
他有他的缺點，你也有你的盲點。這世界上本來就不存在完美的人。沒有人可以百分之百地配合別人，也沒有人需要壓抑自己，只為了討人歡心。
已經不是小學生了，你又何必搶著當風紀股長去注意別人是否肅靜？與其把時間浪費在不相干的人身上，不如用這寶貴的光陰來做對自己更有益處的事情。

心亂
心亂的時候，你像一把音沒調準的吉他，撥出來的都是剌耳的不穩定和弦。
也許你正為了什麼暫時無法解決的事情發愁，或是為了還沒發生而可能發生的災難擔心，你不喜歡這心亂的感覺，卻又無法禁止漫天漫地的胡思亂想。於是你的心更亂，因為你深深地感到對自己的無能為力。我知道你的心正亂，但也請你相信，事情永遠不會像你所預想的那麼糟糕。許多時候，你太習慣自己嚇自己，到頭來只是徒然浪費了時間與力氣。心亂的時候，找一件能讓自己專心投入的事情來做吧！掃掃地，抹抹窗子，或是把堆在水槽裡的碗洗乾淨；當你整理了外在的秩序時，其實也就理清了內心的亂麻。

喜歡自己
你常常因為光陰易逝而恐慌，也常常因為荒廢歲月而不安；面對旁人的要求和自己的期望，你往往不知如何選擇，夾纏在公眾事物與私人情感之間，你總覺得一事無成。於是，置身於紛亂的生活裡，你的心就陷溺如流沙了。快樂的秘訣之一，就是在有限的時間裡，選擇先做你喜歡的事情。只有在一樣樣地完成它們之後，你才會一日比一日更喜歡自己。親愛的，如果今天的你不能比昨天的你更喜歡自己，那麼明天對你來說，又有什麼意義？

別做井底蛙
像一隻井底的青蛙，你抬頭看見的只是一小片天空。當這片天空出了太陽，你就以為全世界都發亮；當它下了雨，你又以為全世界都沒有光芒。井口的周圍就是你的世界的邊界，井口大的天空宰制了你的全部的心思。你沒有想到真正的世界其實是沒有邊界的，也不會知道在那個小天空之外還有個大天空。當你陷入某種人生僵局的時候，你就是這隻青蛙，侷限在潮濕的井底，看見的只是自己的痛苦。所以，你只能用力往上跳，跳出這口井，跳出僵局。然後，你會發現以前的世界何其小，未來的天地何其大。

秋雨
秋雨從高高的雲端落下，洗盡堆積了一夏的塵埃。如果潮濕的天氣讓你有了欲淚的情緒，那就痛痛快快地大哭一場吧。哭泣其實不必有正當的藉口，一如大笑無需任何緣由。人們總是讚美笑，卻不鼓勵哭，但一個不會哭的人就像從來不下雨的天空，只任乾燥的情緒壓抑堆積，不見淋漓活潑的水意。想笑就開心地笑，想哭就放心去哭，能笑也能哭，是對自己的慈悲。哭過的你將感到無限輕鬆，一如雨後的天空無限明淨。

跟著因緣走
小時候，你曾經對別的小孩炫耀：看！我有你沒有。你有的可能是一只風車、一個洋娃娃或一支彩色筆。長大後，你卻開始羨慕你的朋友：唉！他有我沒有。別人有的可能是一分理想的工作、一樁受寵的感情或一種優渥的生活。
孩子氣的炫耀是天真，成人式的羨慕卻不免幼稚了。親愛的，其實你也有很多寶貴的東西是別人沒有的呀！例如說，你可能有堅固的牙齒，當別人只能吃西瓜時，你卻能啃甘蔗；你可能有修長的手指，當別人只能吹口琴時，你卻能彈鋼琴。也許當你羨慕著別人時，別人也在羨慕著你呢。每個人都是這世界上獨一無二的存在，沒有誰比誰更幸運，也沒有誰比誰更尊貴。人生在世，不過是跟著因緣走，而因緣向來是生滅無常的。所以，擁有無須歡喜，因為擁有就代表了有失去的可能；沒有也不必難過，因為沒有才有機會去獲得。在得失之間，無所謂好與壞。一切不過是跟著因緣走。保持一顆心的自由自在，輕輕鬆鬆跟著因緣走吧。當你能夠把世事無常看透，也就是你真正長大的時候。

想想
想想，有什麼事，真的是你非完成不可的？有什麼目的，真的是你非達到不可的？有什麼人，真的是你非留戀不可的？你的心裡總是堆滿了理不清的願望，但是那些人那些事，對你來說真的那麼重要嗎？也許只是一時的迷障，也許只是因為不甘心。有些人有些事，於你的生命其實無益。就像電腦檔案有一定的容量，生命也有使用期限，你只能在有限的時間裡做有限的事，到有限的地方，認識有限的人。所以，認真去做真正想做的事，也認真對待你真正喜愛的人，除此之外，就別再給自己多餘的負擔吧！

不同的我,yeah^^

2009-11-27T20:38:00.008+08:00

回想起我初一的时候,我死都是要进Scout. 进了scout只想要快点考到King Scout. 我利用了初中三年的时间, 来攻我的scout考试. King Scout 是我一直以来的梦想. 这个梦想曾经破灭, 如今我又再度看见了希望. 也许对普通人来说, 它什么也不是, 但对一个scout来说, 他是我们scout最高的荣誉. 话说回来, 即使我再度看见了希望, 心中的那堆火早已不如当年.

如今我才发现, 在我Scout的生涯里, 我能有今天的一切, 不是因为梦想的推动力, 而是我周围那些, 对彼此都有着不离不弃精神的知心好友. 还记得我们初二那年的Camporee(一个在Sin Onn Tiku 的营会), 我们团结了起来. 从那年开始, 我们一起面对困难, 一起分担问题, 到今天还是保持不变. 明年的Scout就是要靠我们这几条"粉场"顶着了. 兄弟齐心, 其力断金^^其实老实说, 我这四年来, 最骄傲的就是交到你们这班狗友..King Scout 我依然会考, 但我一定要和你们一起考. 我们共同奋斗, 共同进退, 要吗就不要考, 要吗就一起干掉它...

如今的我不再为梦想而战, 是为朋友而战..

回来吧, 没有你就不完整了

普照事Camp篇

2009-11-21T20:53:00.002+08:00

This year, i still follow scout to attend this camping,
actually is not follow liao, but bring them to this camping.
The camping for this time is a bit special..
WE CAN'T SLEEP THERE!!!
Yish...the happiest time gone...
juz becoz of those tawau people,
dunno why so scare of the H1N1...
Mao Bian lor...we go there set up our game few days earlier..
juz for today's afternoon...quite tired...
what i can feel is...
our junior really learn things from us...
i am quite happy wiv this...
hope they can keep it up...
we are willing to teach,
but they also must willing to learn.
Actually, i have a lot of memories
in this camping, since junior..
i still remember i almost get into trouble every year.
The first year i attend this camping...
i fall from the flying fox..
last time the flying fox are much more higher,
i didnt follow the rules,
two people play together in one turn,
i fall down, pain, fainted..
when i woke up, i senior is beside me..
then, i was sent to the clinic to have a check up..
haha...
then the next year...
after taking our breakfast,
we play basketball thr...
haha...
i play play xia...suddenly knocked with a people...
head to head...
luckily my head nothing,
but his head bleeding.
He was sent to the hospital..
i still remember that time i feel nervous
luckily got erd, jun kwong and jin vun...
the third year...still ok,
no accident happened..
this year..
still dunno yet lar..
but we will try our best to avoid accident from happening..
haha..

last year night activities

倒霉

2009-11-13T22:19:00.011+08:00

这几天真是倒霉透了，

问题一个又一个地来，

真的可以讲是一波未平，一波又起。

多得几乎让我忘记了我碰到的烦恼。

这几天心情糟透了，

又烦又累，

脾气真的很烦躁。

在这里想向某些人道歉。

我的成绩退步了，

心里很不好受，

我不该拿这种成绩的。

加上一些私人问题，

其实我这得很想问，

你说的"我不再信任友情"

到底是什么意思？

到底因为什么？

另一件事是

今天，我去打排球，

回家时，

爸爸没有注意，

把车从我的脚上面驾着过，

痛到他……prado oh....

T.T

最近，不懂为什么，

倒霉的是接二连三地来...

-----------------------------------

今天听你那么问，

老实说，我会有种很不开心

很不舒服的感觉。

---

2009-11-01T22:30:00.002+08:00

默默地付出，

鬼才看得见你的付出。

无意的伤害却长留他人心中，

想弥补却连机会也没有。

付出多少

换来的总不能回本。

有些事是不能强求的，

是时候说再见，

就潇洒地说声

byebye

！

灰心

2009-10-13T23:06:00.003+08:00

花了整个假期，几乎每晚熬夜，

忙着那张画，也不知花了多少时间和心血，

但那么多的心思，

只需那短短的五分钟，一切就毁了。

复原中的心，虽然不介意再多一道疤痕，

但是那毕竟也是受到“痛”的折磨，

我的心开始灰了，淡了，冷了。

我很后悔，但后悔却于事无补。

haiz...原本很想靠着自己的一双手完成这幅画，

不想要老师的插手，

但haiz.....希望他还有的救。

希望是靠着我这双手把它救活。

能的！我一定能…

我不信我不能…

只要有恒心，铁棒磨成针！

伤心欲绝

2009-09-24T22:20:00.002+08:00

男人流血不流泪，
我终于懂为什么了，
一个人当他真的很伤心时，
如果可以痛痛快快地哭出来，
那就不会那么难受了。
偏偏心中难受，
却又发泄不出来，
那种感觉，
好痛苦……
我真的很难受，
我不想说话，
我不想思考，
我更不想面对。
希望一切平安无事，
让时间冲淡一切……

初次逛斗湖

2009-09-21T23:46:00.007+08:00

今天一早起来，升个懒腰，踏下床，走进洗手间，“放水”，拉水，开水，刷牙，关水，陪爸妈吃早餐（没办法啦，毕竟我是一个好孩子)，吃了一碗虾面，里面有虾，有汤，有面，还不赖。哈哈，懒惰cot废话了，今天我和Romeo, Gay Lou, Sharon 去买东西（其实我没有东西要买，贪爽，跟爽）。大概10点酱，我就去Sharon家。老实说，我和她认识应该有12年了，不过这次还是第一次去他的家。

等了一下，就下去meet Gay Lou 咯……然后我们就走路去买东西。先走路去Wachoi买药，哈哈，我像tai ngong 酱，毕竟对这方面不是很了解。然后就陪Gay Lou去买鞋，先去Ahlee Sport, 但由于价钱太贵，我们的Gay Lou最后还是去Bata……至于他在Bata有什么惨遇呢，我就不说了。然后就去光明书店，Yassin 吃午餐……最后去买一位很特别的朋友的生日礼物。
——————————————————————
原来出发点不同而开始的友情，终究会出现问题，问题终于来了

在我心中

2009-09-07T20:13:00.002+08:00

哦又一次花开又一次花落
这个他那个她
都从身边掠过
那个街头你向我挥手
或许是你的温柔

你说云朵只为风停留
你说时光拉长了枝头
刹那间懂了你的笑容
紧握住你的手
你说今后只作一个梦
我们会拥有满天星斗
织女座会走过银河
和牛郎永远长相守

在我心中最秋天的角落
阵阵的暖意飘过
是你的轮廓缠绕挥不走
让秋冬都到了尽头
在我心中每一次的颤抖
像一光年那么久
牵着你的手经历每个春夏秋冬
收集每一个日落

哦~~~耶
在我心中最秋天的角落
阵阵的暖意飘过
是你的轮廓缠绕挥不走
让秋冬都到了尽头
在我心中每一次的颤抖
像一光年那么久
牵着你的手经历每个春夏秋冬
收集每一个感动

Spending my holiday in a jail.....T.T

2009-08-28T21:38:00.002+08:00

wat the f......
how boring my holiday is...
you force me to fly to selangor...
ok i follow.....
but why can't you tell me when is our flight
and when we come back....
do you know how embaress i am...
...........
...............
..........
....
haiz....
now...i am living in a jail....
..nonono..better use the word"hell" to replace "jail"....
I AM LIVING IN HELL!!!!
do you know what is the feel...
two day din talk....just sitting beside my dad and try to understand those i dun understand de language(hokkien)....
but at the end.....inside my brain still blank....
sleep eat sleep eat then sleep again....
no ball to play....no people to talk to....no internet(lucky cai got)....
haiz.....
if not the phone....sure i will become the a stone....
haiz.....
CONCLUSION=
my holiday is damn boring.....i miss all my friend....jv, jk, sharon, jeanie, mic, and many many.....

2009-08-05T15:46:00.004+08:00

最近我听见一句话:

"每一个Ultraman 的背后都会有一个挨打的小怪兽"

听了过后, 觉得瞒有意思.
想着想着, 突然想到:

人们每一次的胜利, 是不是必须有了失败者的衬托, 才能显示出他的成功呢? 其实真正胜利的人应该是失败的人才对.

Am I a IRONMAN???? #$%^%$%^&*!!!!!!!!

2009-07-06T17:28:00.004+08:00

$%^&*($&*!!!!!!!!!
it is damn tired.....
first i wan to say sorry to all of my classmate....
sorry i din join you all to build our game....
i even din help in anything.....
sorry....
i am too tired and have too many thing to do.....
sorry....

ok....
the first day of our school camping, i build the scout campsite,
actually it is not the first day we start our work...
erm...
nothing special at the whole day,
juz work, eat work, eat,work, and sleep...thats all
after dinner,
we work until 4am.....then sleep for 3++ hour
then wake up and take our breakfast,
for me,
after the breakfast, i find the canteen tauke,
and ask him to help me to cook the egg....
haha....
then after tat ....jiu go prepare....
the second day of our camping,
i nearly spend the whole day for the prefect.....
we go to the Dewan Masyarakat at 10am....
then duty until 3-4 jiang,
then wahthong fetch us to school,
then quickly take a bath then jiu go to the Dewan Masyarakat again....
duty there until 11++pm....
Those fking teacher......
all having different order....
which one should i follow.....
REALLY DAMNSHIT!!!!!!!
after tat, we back to school abt 12am....
haiz...
DAMN TIRED!!!!!!!!
then after day....those campsite de thing haven't finish....
then we jiu continue lor....
I do dao 3 am.....then sleep until 6.....damn.....
TWO DAY SLEEP NOT MORE THAN 7 HOUR.......
Finally te whole campsite is done....
but i am so sad.....
coz not many people interested in our campsite....
haiz.....
thanks for those friend who have pay a visit to our campsite.....
and play our game....
may i know wat do you feel after visiting or playing on our campsite......
haha.....
The most important point is....
although it is a unforgetable memory....
but......
I AM DAMN TIRED NOW......I AM NOT A IRONMAN......

过度充实的假期

2009-06-01T11:12:00.008+08:00

一放假, 我们scout就跑maju hiking......haha...
(lazy to type chinese liao)
ok.....the third time i follow maju hiking.....
this time.....me, jun kwong, fui siong was in the same group...
erm......this hiking was not only a challenge for those junior
but also for senior......
As usual lah.....we nid to be cooperate....
to complete the tough hiking.....
erm....on the way.....we "played" by those teacher.....
erm..i won't describe how the teacher play us...coz it is really hard to believe....
there is only two word can be used to describe the teachers....."变态" but "磨练我们"
At first.....i dun like the way the teacher use to punish us....
they use 军人的处罚方式.......but......now.....i can accept some of the punishment...
but there is still something i can't accept it....
haha...
watever....
it is hard to describe how tough is the hiking...
you need to experience it...then you can know how tough it is....

then..... after the hiking...we have a training camp.....
erm....in this camp, i am facing some friendship problem.....
i quarrel with yung hung and plato.....
erm....i found that....there is a crack between our friendship....
once there is a crack....it take a long time to recover.....
Although now is ok liao.....but.....
something happened mean it's really happened....
the only thing i can do is wait.....and try to recover it....
but if this friendship is change....
maybe i will give up....
watever.....god will arrange everything......

then after the training camp....i fly to KL.....
haha....wat a boring trip.....
then only thing can make me happy de is breakfast, lunch, and dinner....
haha....my stomach is almost full in every meal....
full until....feeling uncomfortable.....
but watever....hard to have a chance to eat so much delicious food....

then after KL.....i fly to KK
to attend a leadership training camp.....
haha
we sleep in Tsun Tsin......it is quite fun there.....
Sabah Chinese de student perform well there....
haha....too 热情.....too active....too crazy.....
when there no people high with us.....we high ourselve...haha
from this camp....i found tat...actually....there is a lot of thing i had already learn
nid to say thank you to our school for giving so much opportunity to us....
to organise a activity....
in other school....then cannot take more than 1 or 2 society...
but our school....we can take 3 society....
and our school 's activity is more than them.....
but there is also something of them is better than us de lah......
haha....make a lot of friend there...
wen huei, zhen hao, haoyang, jade, yanny, mandy, yu ling,zhixing, LuLu...
haha....
my group member.....
happy there...
although we come from different school,
we play, suffer, slove problem, happy, together....
it really feel good..and happy to be with them....
although they are not so crazy....haha
the most crazy member in the group is me liao....
wakakaka...
okok....
type liao so long.....time to rest liao
bye...

领悟了新道理

2009-05-12T23:30:00.003+08:00

有时候看似危机, 却是转机....
有时侯看似转机, 却是危机....
危机就是转机,
转机也是危机,
只在乎你怎样扭转.....
坦白依然很重要,
无论什么情都好,
只要能坦白,
一切都能迎刃而解....
一份友情能够维持,
全靠坦白.....
没有一份友情是不经过风风雨雨的,
朋友,
我珍惜你..........

Interact Installation

2009-05-09T00:22:00.003+08:00

Hiaz...刚去完Interact de Installation,
我还是第一次去这样的......
第一次穿地那么formal....
很不习惯.....
erm.......我是带着期待的心情去,
毕竟是第一次出席这种场合,
还好啦, 我们这tang高一scout这样穿的这么formal在一起,
还是第一次......hehe.....
有合照.....^^
"三剑客"...~.~!!!!
"高一党(formal)"....hehe....
原本去的时候我很期待....
但回的时候,
却有种不开心的感觉.....
但我又不懂是为什么而感到不开心....
在车上还有少少向父母pot lot.......hehe....
watever.....
haha.....
[The End]

You sucks!!!!!

2009-05-05T22:31:00.005+08:00

YOu sucks!!!!!!!!!
Damn YOu!! I hate you!!!!!!.....
YOu dun respect me, so i dun nid to respect you!!!!!!
DAMN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

First Aid Camp....

2009-04-26T22:33:00.003+08:00

erm.....this time we are juz member...
no more committee....
so.....nothing special.....
then juz wan to say sorry here....
actually you all wan us S1 bring them de....
but we din do tat....
sorry.........erm.....
being punished by people is not tat happy de....
finally we realize tat....
hahaha....they also din did wrong de.....
okok....
erm....actually i am quite happy with all our junior....
haha....especially our group....
for me.....i really feel happy when playing game with them....
haha.....juz like last night.....
okok.....
i promise i will try my best to help my group in the discipline camp.....
sorry to all our senior and J3 de.

This few day.........

2009-04-22T23:15:00.003+08:00

nothing special.....
wahaha.....ok bah.....
erm....this week got many people birthday....
happy birthday to jin vun....ching ju.....and chinn tyng....
after tat will be sharon....
hehe...i lazy to say happy birthday later...
so i say now lah.....
happy birthday sharon.....
erm.....well....jiu...
a normal week jiu like this pass liao....
hehe.....

Volleyball again........=,=

2009-04-12T22:25:00.003+08:00

well......volleyball again.....
this time is a bit different....
it is a mixed volleyball.....(wth!!!...volleyball also can mix)
watever.....fun also lah......
erm.....this time....our class got 2 team....
one is sharon de.....one is wai de.....
erm.....of course me is sharon that group lah....
in the begining we only lose liao 1 match....S3B==!!!!
still ok lah.....although we lose liao.....
it is a challenging match.....both team juz keep covering the girls....
wahahaha.....got crazy dao.....
erm....for my team.....i wan to say sorry to man hou loh......
today.....he come but we dun let him play......
and sorry to all the girl......
you guys pay to come and play de.....
but......aiz.......
no let you guys touch dao ball......
sorry oh.....
haiz....
you girls really improve a lot......
dun keep blaming yourself.....
you all really try ur best liao.....
we need to enjoy de match.....
watever..hehe.....it is over......
hope next time we still have chance to be teamate again...^^

Badminton Competition

2009-04-05T22:21:00.003+08:00

ok.......after the volleyball competition, after two day is the badminton competition,
haha, becoz it is too close....so i have no time to practise....
then Saturday is the first day of the badminton competition,
well.....erm....this time I am a seed....
for me, the second round still ok......
but the quater final......haiz....
me nearly lose......dunno why...
i make a lot of unforce error......until me kena goreng by people in the first set.....
i really got scare dao lah tat time.....
everyone keep calling his name....
then to release stress.....me shout in the court.....
then......also got nget dao lah.....coz too many unforce error....
but at the last, i win liao.....phew.....
then today...haha....my double wiv ah lo de nearly disqualified.....
luckily yesterday i got mention i will be last.....
double in semi final now.....
abt....single.....me and ah lo lose liao......
he lose to khoo wiv 16-21,18-21,
me lose to qiu kai cheng wiv 21-18, 21-23, 18-21,
hehe quite near xia lah.....
watever...lose dao happy....
tomorrow need to vs Lo Hoe Xing liao.....
Lo Hoe Xing oh!!!!!
shit.....why same wiv last year.......
this time sure lose liao......
watever....it juz a game.....
hehe....

Volleyball competiton........

2009-04-01T20:11:00.003+08:00

well......this few day is the volleyball competition,
erm....for me......no more pressure when we are playing with other class....
not like last few year......when it is match point.....we sure will under pressure....
haha, this year......i know we got senka dao......
juz keep playing and does not be serious during the match....
tomorrow is final.......we will vs S1O tomorrow.....
haha.......and i annouce here.......this competition will become the ending or my volleyball life...
after this competition....maybe i will seldom go play volleyball liao.....
hehe....whatever......my homework is more important if compare wif volleyball...
nid to start preparing for next year.....not for SPM but for my future.....
althought i still dunno where will i go..... the only thing i know is...
now.....everything nid to have good de foundation....
hehe......watever...........

haha......here is the good news......but i still in the process of making decision....
last saturday....we S1 saw a opportunity to become a king scout.....
but is it real.....?i mean is it affortable? i can see a lot of example from our senior....
they make a decision to become a king scout and they really put a lot of effort on it....
but at the last......nobody can reach their target....
so this mean maybe we will have the same ending like last few year....
the point is......is it affortable???????if it is not.....mean i am juz wasting my time.....
but if it is real.....i really will try my best to reach my target....
watever....i know you guys will tell me not to think too much...hehe....okok....
King Scout? real? affortable?

Camporee!!!!!

2009-03-22T18:03:00.010+08:00

This year is the third year i join the camporee....

every year, we nid to stay at sin onn tiku for 5 day....

althought it is hard and tiring....

we solve every problem together juz like before.....

erm.....camporee........

i still can remember.....our Senior 1 Gang is "born" there,

that time we are in form 2......

that is the first time we went to the camporee....

waliao....we can't build anything....and becoz of lack of experience,

for us, we dunno everything.....we only know tat if we wan to protect ourselve,

we nid to be cooperate....then at that time, we do everything together....

and we accompany each other....until now.....we still appreciate our gang....

this year de camporee....

erm.....quite tiring lah.....

i get a serious sun burn at the first day,

really can saw a line on my neck and both of my hands....

but watever.....

this year.....we did a lot of thing.....

we all build the campsite together....

and this year is the fastest year to build our campsite....

at the first day, we almost finish the whole campsite, leaving the tower....

then the second day,

we started to build the tower....

cham loh....let us build tower.....

we all like to sleep on the tower de althought last few year senior dun like us to sleep on it....

haha...

this year....we plan to build a tower for us to sleep....

haha...

then we really slept on the tower for 3 night....

haha.....

this year.....we juz keeping building the campsite.....

no more chance to go for activities liao...

during the camping....

sometime....the sun hot until can burn your skin....

when raining......becoz of wet and the strong wind....

it can be cold.....especially at night....

but watever....

it is also memorable....

we really felt happy and proud when we saw our achievement....

camporee is one of the most tough camping in a year....

a person who can live there for 5 day mean he/she is a reala scout....

and mean he/she is able to live in a terrible enviroment...

here is some photos during our camping...

two year ago....J2 tong

one year ago....J3 tong wiv some junior....

Now de us....we respect our flag...we already becoz senior...we already grown up....

Our achievement.....we only take 2 day to finish the whole tower.....^^

S1Gang is building the tower....

Our kitchen, the place we cook and take our meal.....all build by member of 18th Tawau.....

walaower......

2009-03-10T21:41:00.002+08:00

these few day de exam ah......
dunno wat am i writing..
although i put a lot of effort on it
when i am taking the exam,
i brain is blank.......
damn.......
blablablabla...
oh ya, that day when we are waiting len len to help us do revision,
i am talking wiv jeanie...
the suddenly, she use "smelly" word to scold me....
then just keep smiling.....
nagisat....
wao........
first time..she use those word to scold people....haha..
keep it up....

then.........nothing special....
oh ya.....
I HATE EXAM!!!!!!!!!!!
==
but after exam is holiday liao.........
yeah.......
the good news is....
my parent want to go hongkong in this holiday....
the bad news is.....
i can't follow themT.T
haiz.....
watever.....
i believe tat my holiday will be fun too............

Haiz.......

2009-03-01T22:08:00.002+08:00

This week, i am damn busy......
do revision, planning the bbq, prefect, blablablabla.....
wat the hell......
exam is coming but nothing in my brain......
the physics and chemistry......
haiz.....
i dunno how to take the exam......
this time sure fail my science.......
erm......
abt yesterday......
i stay at school after the lesson until 10.30....at night....
the first time i stay at school until so long.....
quite busy.....
after having my lunch....
i went to scout....
then that day, we incharge in giving them lesson....
then after scout, we quickly rush to the canteen and borrow those utensil,
wah......then the tauke wan us to help him punch the fork......
but watever.....we juz do it....
then we meh start to prepare the fire for the bbq loh....
walaower....my troop t-shirt ah.....change from white to black....
but it is ok......as long as they feel happy wiv the bbq party...
here, i want to say thanks you, to all of my friend.....
we all really did liao a lot of things.....
that night i am quite tired, after the volleyball practice....
then when i back home, and after taking bath......................
ZZZZzzzzzzz.........

shit.......
how to do revsion for all the subject oh......
walaower.......
the SPM physics 6 question, i only know 2,
SPM oh!!!!!!!!!!!!!
then UEC how........
all blank loh.......
shit.....
chemistry........
also shit.........
many i dun understand......i only know isotopes.....
haiz....
and the bio......
many nid to memorise.....
besides, those moral, chinese, sejarah.....eh
nid to write essay wah......
mean nid to understand it well loh.....
how to read oh.................
pressure................

烦人的这几天

2009-02-18T20:31:00.002+08:00

这几天，不懂做什么，
就是有一种无形的压力，
或者是可能心中有所不爽。
就…不懂为什么。
可能是美术要dateline了，
我还有一大堆……
可能是数学要交上去了，
我也还有一大堆，
可能罢了，
不过这些东西，对我来说，根本是小儿科。
那种压力，我又不是没有承受过，
那种滋味我又不是尝试过……
其实，我应该很清楚，
我是因为跳不出那个圈圈而不开心，
那次，其实我已经可以踏出那个圈了，
但……我总是太心软……haiz.....
总是被拉回来……
还有哦……
我总是有一种冲动想以后都静静的呆在你们身旁，
听你们说话就够了，
反正，我发觉我往往都参不进你们的话题，
我听了不是不知道要给什么表情，就是无言……
无言更死，
听了过后，如果真的无言，你觉得我可以有什么表情？
我说话，又把得罪到你们，
我不说话，你们又说我不尊重你……
好loh....我以后都不说，
我这么打，并不是要怪罪于你们，
你们没有错，
问题是在我身上，
对不起loh....我其实是每次都是在玩的，
我很少会向一个人发脾气，
除非那个人，真么很过分loh......
如果你们很不喜欢我这样的话，
好！我改……
但你们又未尝没有想过你们自己的缺点，
可能只是没人告诉你罢了……
我承认我有错，
每次想到这里，我的肚子里就一把火。
我知道我没有资格发你们的脾气，
对不起……
从今以后，我会有所改变，
改变后，是否还能成为朋友，
那就随缘吧！

一个表面上很开心的新年

2009-01-29T20:14:00.002+08:00

这个新年，蛮多活动一下，也让我学会了赌博，但不要想歪，我一点也不烂赌。
erm....在这里顺便谢谢我的朋友们，让我这个年过得很充实。
一切都还好啦，
就只是有种除了赌博就没事做的感觉……
haiz.......
开学就是运动会了，
青队的步操不知道怎么样……人从来没有到齐过，
能不能赢？想都不敢想……
最近心情不怎样好……
起伏不定，
因为我还无法适应没有哥哥生身活？？？？？？==
我早就适应了，
我早在他走了后的几天就适应了。

其实，
我是有压力，
尤其是运动会，
步操已经有够大的压力了，
再加上我的腰……
还有5天就要比赛了，
我……T.T
5天能让我好起来吗？不可能，
我正犹豫着我到底还能不能够参赛.....haiz...
不参赛有不知如何向老师解释……
参赛只会加重我的伤，
我若受伤了
3月的排球校级赛又怎样？
我练了一年就是等那一天……

还有！！！！
我冷下来了！！！
我一点也不喜欢现在的我，
我也不明白以前的我变到哪里去了，
haiz......
有时候，
为了不要让朋友受伤害，
而选择自己承担，
那种感觉很不好受，
想和其他朋友分享，
但总是没有机会，
没有办法，幸好我没那么容易倒下，
希望过了这关，
一切将会顺顺利利。

小小的动作，大大的关系……对不起

2009-01-16T22:08:00.004+08:00

我从来没有想过，那么小小的一句话，会带来那么大的伤害……偏偏那小小的一个动作，又可以带来无限的支持……对不起，我说错了话……我没有办法说我是无意的……应为我根本就是刻意的，今晚不懂为什么，突然间通了，原来我错了，原来我已经造成了伤害。往往我说话总是忽略了自尊，无论是别人的自尊，或我本身的自尊，我都不放在眼里。对不起！除了对不起还是对不起！虽然我知道我的“对不起”早已变得没有任何的价值，但除了这三个字，我说不出其他字。我发觉，往往一句小小的话，就足以让一个人不开心一阵天。相反地，一个小小的动作，却可以让人开心一阵天。我一直很努力的在寻找机会，很想正面向你道歉，但总是没有机会……不过我相信我会！我一定会！无论你接受不接受，我都会向你道歉。一切小而不起眼的东西，一但他累积起来，就能到来巨大的伤害。一点点的小误会，如果没有说清楚，一旦累积起来，就能造成挽不回的局面。

朋友~对不起……我不想造成一个无法挽回的局面……因为我很珍惜你................这个好朋友……

It is DAMN BUSY!!!!!!!

2009-01-08T22:22:00.002+08:00

Walaower...
This few day ar.....
DAMN BUSY!!!!!!!
I missed many lesson,(hehe sometime is i dun wan to have lesson lah)
but the homework ah....
haiz.....if compare to J3......
HAiz...you all know de lah....
and this few day.....quite busy.
I haven't help my brother to get his leaving letter.....
Tomorrow nid to duty, haiz....solo again.....
and.....i found tat....
there is a lot of thing i can't understand de....
how come science class de lesson jiang difficult de....
haiz.....those maths ar.......
the only thing tat appear in my brain de is question mark......
haiz....
it is damn fast!!!!!
we are a senior now....
haiz....
many damn thing nid to learn....
haiz.....
watever...
sorry for always say the word"damn"
=.=

ok!!!last day!!!!

2008-12-28T00:14:00.005+08:00

Today is the last day liao!!!!The last day he stay in Tawau.We will fly to KL tomorrow. I haven't pack my laugage.......watever=.=!!! enjoy the last day first!!!!!

I lost a driver.....
I lost a partner......
I lost a friend.......
I lost a people who let me bully....XD
MY BROTHER IS LEAVING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ALL OF HIS PROPERTY HERE WILL BE MINE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

what can i do? there is ntg i can do de mah!!!!SOI de mah!!!!Watever.......=.=!!! now is already 12.22......i can't sleep......too exited???no..... actually is i don wan to sleep.....hehe! Now my stupid brother is leaving.....hehe, two more year later.....it's my turn to leave...wakakaka.....He jiu good lah!!!! got a ngong chan brother to type this damn stupid blog for him before he leave......next time when I leave, who type for me!!!?!?!?!?!...=.=!!!!watever!!I don't need it.......XD

Every people keep asking me, how is my feel????? Next year ur bro leave liao, you meh so lonely.....=.=!!My Answer is......................BO FEEL!!!yeah!!!!!actually got lah, got lonely de feel......................coz nobody to let me bully liao.........impossible to bully my parent de mah!!!! really SOI de mah!!!!!wakakakaka

.........

2008-12-25T12:20:00.002+08:00

Last night, although it is christmas eve, I can't sleep well, i juz keep thinking what he say.He is right!!! Actually I can stop all of these from happening...I know it will be dangerous, but i didn't stop it..... this is the first time i agree with him. I say "I agree" doesn't mean he is right at all. I am very confident with our technique, I only agree wiv the word" Actually you can stop it, but you didn't stop it" moody, keep blaming myself??? sure got lah! when i heard they laugh.......I try to pretend like nothing happened and laugh wiv them, but it is hard. It's already happened, I can't pretend like nothing happened ...I know it is my mistake, there is also nothing wrong if i blame myself, coz i really make a wrong decision......I have learn a lesson, I promise i will do it better next time. I won't repeat the same mistake again.......

Haha^^ kena tagged liao, still same as last time lah, half serious half play play!!!!

2008-12-13T21:11:00.002+08:00

Tagged
1. Do you have secrets?sure lah!
2. Would you fall in love with a girl/ boy younger than you?=,=!!!maybe......
3. Do you enjoy going to college?no gua......
4. What would you do with a billion dollars?keep it loh....then spend it wisely........
5. Will you fall in love with your best friend?wah......dunno leh, wat is love..........
6. Which is more blessed, loving someone, or being loved by someone?how i know.......NO EXP!!!!!
7. List 5 recently watched movies..................forgot their name.....
8. If the person you secretly liked is already attached, what would you do?sad but try to pretend nothing loh.......as long as she is happy gua..........
9. List 5 favourite TV shows.no tv=,=!!!
10. Do you have any regrets?Yes, A LOT!!!!!!
11. How would you see yourself in 10 years time?Maybe will have a big change gua....
12. Who are the most important people to you?family and all my true friend
13. What kind of person do you think the person who tagged you is?A rich person, he can be a serious people, but also can be a funny, talkative people......
14. Would you rather be single and rich, or married but poor?married but poor
15.What is your favourite colour?white
16. Would you give all in a relationship?maybe......
17. First five words that popped into your mind right now.wat should i type here=,=!!
18. What are the top five places on your "to-go"list?(a)Paris (b)US (c)Australlia (d)Japan (e)Sweden(in the year 2011)
19. Name three things you would like to do, but would not be able to?(a)all the J3 scout stay!!! (b)Hug all my friend!!XD juz kidding (c) burn the ugly people board!!
20. 8 people I have tagged jeanie....jin vun.....erd.......samantha.......michelle......candis......fui siang....joey
Tag for?fun

我到底怎么了

2008-12-12T18:49:00.004+08:00

以下这一段是是隐藏在我内心的秘密，看得懂就当作一个秘密，看不懂就算了

许喜但什么天asfczsca前以吧总人a`253t6ewt235325sfzxvcxzv变会或，我Sfczdv或喜asfd许或的欢是，吧当每我，会终，536235135种一无。的他举asd一我变吧当asd每或喜的是，我我不fazsc，但在zsfcasdf。终一acsxcsafaszcdfas有ewgsdgbsdg乎么开怎的。他了变吧asdasdasxzcfv吧总人变会或，我许fdaas我他我他fdasfzvxvsz他他举一一足623536548658他不的见531543，种xvxcvxcv一无的形力压我我sd不一足以asd影的aasfassd，但在。乎我他我情心许吧总人变会或，我许了变吧了有力压，种一cx2z他dsgfdhery75468679763524613看我心sad他见。的他举一一力fzscv见或是xcvxcv，我as，但在。以响的形cxvs影的我情心许有种力压，种一asda无的举一动以响的asdfz我2352345135他不31243qwrwr42t的是，我我不d，但在。235235，我许力压的形力23523当总变会或，我了变。的，会终一我他，会种力，种一。欢

我打这篇东西，纯粹是发泄，让我心里好过一些！！

我的肚子啊！！！

2008-12-10T19:31:00.003+08:00

这几天真是很不好受，肚子不知道为什么，几天都不会感到饿，
虽然知道我的肚子是空空的，
但就是不想要吃东西，很不舒服，很不好受一下。
至于怎么会这样，都怪那几天吃得太多。

前几天的下午(大概2点多酱），我们一家人在西马参加我表姐的婚宴。
我们两兄弟和我一个同年的堂弟和我阿公，爸妈，伯伯伯母们同一桌。
他们就好啦，一家人坐在一起，有说有笑。
我们三个所谓的年轻人，就惨了。
又听不懂福建话，
只好坐在那里，你看我，我看你。

那天下午，吃东西时，
可以说是我噩梦的起因。
大人们最厉害说的就是，
“年轻人发育时期吃多一点”
好loh!!没办法，吃就吃。
大概吃到4点多。
我们三个人的肚子已经饱到吃不下了，因为一餐就吃了两餐的分量，
haiz..............

这样还不用紧oh!!
大概六点多，我爸“命令”我们两兄弟跟我的堂哥代表我的伯伯去参加另外一个婚宴。
adui!!!!!!我知道我的肚子，再吃下去一定出问题了。
在没办法之下，我只好硬着头皮去。
4点才吃完一顿很heavy的午餐，7点又来一顿。
去到那边，好安排不安排，安排我们和几个老伯坐在同一桌。
haiz.........
又听到同一句话“年轻人…………”
还不停的夹菜给我们。
hiaz.......
我当时真的有想吐的感觉但就是吐不出。

第二天，
我早上起来，完全不觉得饿。
吃早餐，发梦啦！
我大概到下午4点才吃。
吃不是因为饿，而是不想伤到肚子。
haiz........

羽球赛

2008-11-30T22:31:00.003+08:00

哇，这两天还真是惨。昨天是羽球比赛，哇，个个都很厉害，我可说得上是noob。（其实当时根本就是）。比赛的前一天晚上，我的partner叫我早一点到那边陪他，ok loh!!!反正我在家也是等，倒不如到那里和朋友一起等。就这样等了半粒钟……总算他开门了。进到礼堂我们找了一个“疯水”位，又这样像tai ngong 酱等了15分钟。突然，一个很熟悉的pot tai lang（Ah lo)走进来，才想起昨晚邓月慧才跟我讲ah lo也有参赛。过后，我们又一直等…………等……ai~总之那天其实一直都在等。我们那几个人当中最早下场的是我partner的单打。还好啦，我有在观察，因为如果我赢了第一圈，就会对到他们两个人胜出的那一位。hehe,其实我也没什么眼福，才看了前面几粒球，就报了我的名字，要下场“开战”了。我meh拿了拍下场咯。wah~那家伙还真厉害，有羽球不打，跑去架飞机了.haiz.......结果我酱厉害出汗的人，一滴汗也没有出就很不小心地赢了那场球，我也不想的。过后回去，ah lo 那边，陪他做等待中的ngongchan。hehe,过了不久，ah lo终于下场了（double)，哇！！他们的对手，两个都酱大，看起来不像18岁以下。然后？然后ah lo kena goreng........但其实他打的很不错了，是对手太强了。hehe, 然后轮到我下场了（双打）,不用说，也是kena goreng哈哈！这还不用紧oh, 刚打完了双打，连着去打单打，还要是对到自己的partner......ok loh, 打loh......到第二个set时，两个人差不多要soi liao.....结果最后我赢了，进入4强（其实4强里，我是最差的那个，还要是不小心进到的）。ok loh......没有办法，我有得等了。我的下一场比赛是在2.00，所以和ah lo他们到新安巴刹去吃午餐。哇！！在那里猛灌冰水，因为水不够。接下来，回到兴华去，准备我的下一场球。hiaz.....注定会输得，我也根本没有赢的念头，输是输定的，是看输到多惨罢了。=,=!!! 结果，果然kena goreng again.......21-9,21-10酱。不过无所谓，我只不过是抱着那种玩玩下的心态来打的。hehe, 接下来就有点委屈ah lo 了，要他陪我等领奖，等了接近两个钟。ai~~总之那整天就是等罢了。

今天，在家又有点闷，结果下午又陪哥哥去打羽球（又是羽球!!!!开始产生恐惧感了）又打loh!!!!前面几场单打，我还可以，接下来几场，haiz........可能是因为手臂超劳过度，连把手抬起来都有少少吃力。过后，我有没有理他，继续打，打到整5点才回家，waliaowe..........那只手不要得了。早知就不要打酱多啦，不过不用紧，多的是时间养伤，还可以大多几天排球。^^

无聊的假期…………

2008-11-24T18:22:00.002+08:00

这几天还真是有sienz到。差不多每天8.30这样就到学校去，到学校去做什么，hiaz.......说来都闷。原本不想到学校去的，但在家有闷得发慌，到了学校只是在那里看他们写report，发现了问题就和他们讲，就总之尽量要他们做到最好，我甚至可以坐下来帮他们做，因为这是他们最后的机会了。我很不想看到他们再次的失败，我甚至不想再次看到失败或fail这些字。就总之，心里有种感觉，他们成功或许我没帮上什么忙，但他们失败我又有种该负上些什么责任的感觉，心里很不好受。看见另一组的人很快的把report做完，还在那里炫耀他们有多开心，hiking经历了多少，说真的，听了很不是滋味，并不是怪他们骄傲，而是责备自己为什么会犯一些不因该犯的错。虽然我不是考生，那为什么当初我还要给于他们意见，或许就是这些意见害了他们，或许就是我当时爱理不理的态度害了他们，要吗就从头帮到尾，要吗就简直不要帮。所以，这次他们的report我从头到尾都在他们的旁边，甚至可以帮的我都尽量帮，或许从老师的角度来看，我是害了他们，但如果我不这样做，我又不忍心看着他们连着最后的一次机会也没有了。我真的不知要怎样做才好，帮又不是，不帮又不好受，难道正如俊康所说的，我太心软了吗？这到底是好还是不好呢？有谁能告诉我，我是否因该继续这样，还因该改变呢？

我的这几天…………（photo)

2008-11-21T10:52:00.002+08:00

走太久走不出去，开始灰心了。

发烧的Xiao Lai真可怜，指着它说是神山 =,=!!!

初三煮出来的晚餐，味道还不错。

因为顽皮被老师罚脱衣。haha

我的这几天…………

2008-11-19T18:49:00.005+08:00

首先，先说一说maju hiking，一个让我们辛苦，但又让我们拥有许多回忆的camping+hiking。我很想跟我那组的初二们说声对不起，我真的帮不了你们，对不起，除了对不起三个字我真的不知道我还可以说什么……不过，当中也促进了我们两个初三很那几个puk gai之间的关系。没有想到他们能越骂puk gai越high，到最后整组人都变成了puk gai 组。整组人最puk gai 的就是Xiao Lai，真不知他发什么烧，敢敢看到bukit gemok就指着他跟我们大喊说他看到了Mt.Kinabalu，听到了真为他感到担心，荒山野岭到哪去帮他找医生。虽然他们这次Hiking的结果不是我们想要的结果，但途中也让我们感受到同心协力面对挑战，一起共患难的精神。途中有一点好笑的事情发生，他们因为跑得太慢而被老师罚（只有我和梁瀞文两个没有被罚），至于怎么罚,hehe，总之就罚到连我们两个service.co都笑到没有停。结果他们就因为被老师罚，而带着一身的河水上路。晚上那个死sniper发高烧，pukgai!!!!! 他好讲!!!!!!那我的牙膏去洗碟，wat the.............，牙膏不用钱买啊？用了牙膏还想打我牙刷的主意，结果在忍痛的情况下，我献上了我的shower foam来给他洗那些煮饭用具（是有少少wei啦，谁叫那个总务没有带洗碗水来）,至于第二天早上发生的事情，就让他成为一个没有人知道的秘密。

接下来是普照寺camp，不知道为什么，跑玩了一个Maju Hiking，还可以精神奕奕的去普照寺camp, 今年的普照寺camp可以说是我参加3年来最多朋友的一次，但不是说什么，只是人太多反而变得有点闲。不过还好，以前只是scout自己在那边自high，如今多了几个Puk gai一起疯，真是过瘾，还有我想对我那班的洗碗工作人说声对不起loh! 我一直参scout, 不参你们玩，还有我不是要和你们唱反调，不和你们一起穿班服，而是我们在你们穿班服那天掌halangan komando，穿班服很容易肮脏，对不起啊!!!!在此，我想恭喜Erd, 他总算是在他最后一次机会玩flying fox时，克服了多年以来对flying fox的心理障碍。口喊一声"我是Erdnest",就从高高的flying fox 上跳了下来，说真的我能体会他在上面的感受loh! 我也面对过这样的困难，但很不小心地被我克服了，当你经过意外后，你真的会变得比较胆小，没有自信心。但一旦克服了过后，wah!!!!你试一下玩flying fox 不约我看啊!!!!

摩擦

2008-11-13T22:05:00.002+08:00

要从那里说起呢？ok!我直接进入重点。我不想和你有那种摩擦，为什么不能两个人坐下来，好好谈谈呢？你不爽我就直接跟我讲，我不喜欢那种在我背后讲我，那种挑拨离间的人的人，如果我真的有这样做请你跟我讲，但请你在讲我之前想一想你有没有资格讲我，自己做好你的本分才讲我。我错，我会认，但如果你错我也错，打死我都不会向你道歉。如果你要开战，我随时奉陪。但想一想，开战了对谁都没有好处，大不了两败俱伤。我的选择，是避免开战，能够好好解决它。我坚决相信友情是一定会有很多风风雨雨的，两个人一起克服得越多，那份友情就越稳固，越牢不可破。明明能成为好朋友，为什么要因为那一点点的小事而不爽……我承认我在当中有点过分，你何尝又没有错。简单讲一句，我们都有错。这是我的看法，居然都知道有错，为何不一人让一步，把之间的问题解决掉。我从今天开始，我会先开始让步，至于你要怎么做，就随你，我是不想要情况继续恶化下去。

普照寺篇1

2008-11-11T19:54:00.003+08:00

这几天开始在普照寺搭东西了，但其实一个星期似乎有点太多了，为了拖延时间，有时打打球，有时偷偷懒的过日子。其实说偷懒也没偷多少懒啦~我们尝试着搭着几样新的halangan komando，虽然还有地方需要改进。过几天就是maju hiking 了，想到这个haiz..........我们初三要负责他们当天的晚餐，可是现在勇宏，俊康，他们不在，又讨论不到。haiz.........我看还是我们去准备吧。今天早上搭东西时闹得很不爽，也委屈了初二他们。对不起…………其实看得出他们真的做了很多，加油！至于女生，很明显她们这次有做到工了，各项halangan komando她们都有参与搭，比起以前真的不同了，希望她们能保持这种态度，其实她们行的。初三来的很少，haiz.............很难发挥以往那种合作精神，感受到那种在一起做事情的欢乐，ai........总之就没有那种感觉了。在这次的camping中希望我们能再度发挥那种，只要我们在一起就天不怕，地不怕，的精神。

half serious,half play play^^ have a look lah!!^^

2008-11-01T21:44:00.007+08:00

[01] Name: Yap Kang Shiang
[02] Nickname: no nickname....
[03] Married: Wah!!!!not going to married.......
[04] Zodiac Sign: Cancer
[05] Gender: a boy
[06] Age: 15
[07] High School: Sabah Chinese High School
[08] College: how i know????i am just 15. +.+
[09] Height: 170cm
[10] Weight: 55kg,gua......
[11] Do you like yourself: ......
[12] Piercings:what is piercing
[13] Right or left:donno wat is this......
[14] Are you a freak : of course yes lah
[15] Hair: if say long also nobody will believe lah........
[16] Skin: wah!!my skin???rainbow's colour
[17] Allergic: Allergic to everything
[18] What are you doing now: you think leh?=,=,of course typing lah.
[19] What will you do 1 hour later: sleeeeeeeep lah!!! just check out from camp,now so tired.+,=
[20] What will you do 10 years later: sleep.=,=
[21] Live with mother/father/parents: Parents
[22] Siblings (included you): 12 (a football team)
[23] Eldest: Kang Nian( Tai Ngong)
[24] Youngest: me gua????
[25] Love/hate your family: half love half hate...hehe,no lah
[26] You found your another half: hehe,
[27] If yes, who is he/she: You mean which one?hehe
[28] If no, who you want he/she to be: dono......
[29] Time(s) you in relationship: 0
[30] Ever woo boy/girl(0-100000): no
[31] Anyone woo you before(0-100000): no
[32] Did anything wrong to your other half: i am always the right!XD
[33] What was/were the wrong you had done: murdering, er.r..r, stealing..wah!!!!!!!...
[34] Ever argue with your other half: you mean which one?
[35] You with your other half since:since i was born
[36] Are you straight/Lesbo: Straight..?
[37] Reasons you love your other half: ugly, er...r stupid, not more than 120cm, botak.............
[38] You and your other half in which stage: enemy
[39] You woo he/she or he/she woo you: woo?
[40] Ever think of marry he/she: how i know? i dunno who she is.=,=
[41] Your first best friend: myself........hehe
[42] Your first enemy: also myself.......
[43] The friend you love the most: myself.......
[44] The enemy you hate the most (1only): myself......
[45] Your most beautiful girl friend: myself
[46] Your most handsome guy friend: myself
[47] The kind of girl you hate the most: think themself very pretty but actually not and those fa hiao de girl
[48] The kind of boy you hate the most: ah gua
[49] You fall in love with your close friend before: no lah! i am not gay
[50] Your best friend is your ex-lover: donno
[51] If your friend backstabbing you: I think my friends wouldn't
[52] If your friend betray you: of course sad and disappointed
[53] If your friend woo your lover: ??
[54] If your friend fall in love with you: maybe will try loh......
[55] If you fall in love with your best friend: chase her gua.........
[56] Are you a good student: no, useless prefect
[57] You always done your homeworks/assignments: never
[58] The teacher/tutor you love the most: myself
[59] Always late to school/college:of course!
[60] Your class: Monday ~ Saturday
[61] You love your seniors: yes gua
[62] Senior who you love the most: those in scout de senior
[63] Your classmates good/bad: some good some bad
[64] Excellent result classmate: Lois and Stephen
[65] Laziest classmate: me!!!!!!!yes!!!!!!!
[66] Smart people: People who work hard,gua!?!?!
[67] Stupid people: Er..Do stupid things gua..
[68] Good looking people: People who always smile
[69] Ugly people: People who have bad heart
[70] Funny people: People who are funny themselves, good in joking
[71] Cute people: Innocent, the way I think they're cute
[72] Bad people: With a bad heart
[73] Honest people: Never lies
[74] Acting people: Pretender
[75] You are what kind of people: bad,ugly,stupiak,wu liao....hehe

PREFER~~
[76] Lip or eyes: eyes...
[77] Hugs or kisses: hugs lah.....
[78] Shorter or taller: not taller than me
[79] hesitant or spontaneous: hesitant
[80] Nice stomach or nice arms: Nice arms
[81] Listener or talker: Listener
[82] Romantic or rich: Romantic
[83] Good husband or Good Father: good husband

FUTURE~~
[84] Age to get marry: 50!!
[85] Numbers of kid(s): 12(football team).wakakakaka,no lah,if really 12,then my wife meh so cham?? see lah,if she wan then jiu wan,if dun wan jiu don wan
[86] Career: ???
[87] Salary: As long as it can support me
[88] Retirement age:21,wakakaka
[89] Properties value: enough for me jiu ok liao gua........
[90] Wishes: all my fren stay happy now and forever........

如何开口

2008-10-29T19:05:00.002+08:00

那天校长用P.A system报告健言社要开会。haiz.......健言社就健言社，干嘛加我？我不是说我不再是健言社社员，而是scout又有活动。##%*@#*!!!!!!!!!!!!健言社的活动和scout的活动干嘛每一次都撞在一起。要我放弃scout的活动,不可能！但放弃健言社的活动又觉得对不起，haiz......我该怎么办？？？？？？？？？上一次，干部训练营我就进了校长室三次，haiz........这一次，我不知道要怎么跟校长开口。难道又说因为scout又有活动吗？我怕校长nget loh!虽然我知道他不会，但我根本不知道她会怎样想我这个人，每次活动最nyamjiam的就是我。我不敢说健言社需要我，但每次叫到我去，我总是会有一大堆的问题。haiz...........

为什么要在这个时候受这个打击？！？！？！

2008-10-07T21:58:00.003+08:00

最近这几天，当华语老师在派考卷时，walaoweh!!!!PMR还可以啦，但那UEC…………是我一生中第一次的失败，说句实话，打击真不小。“一生”或许太夸张，如果用“中学生涯”因该会比较好。我不明白为什么这次的失败，比起小学UPSR的C和巴中入学试的6X.XX%，对我的打击使在重得多了。今天，当我拿到考卷时，我实在看都不敢看，因为我就算拿到超出我程度的分数，也不能够把握拉回我一直以来的分数。但最后我还是看了，我算了算分数，我failed了。很多地方因为当时不够时间去填而被扣了很多分。今天拿了考卷后，心情很沉重（其实我也不懂怎么去形容当时的心情，说自责是有一点点，唉，就是不懂怎么形容啦！总之就是我从来都没有过的心情）拿了考卷后的那一节是科学老师代课，我伏在那里检讨，然后尽量专心听课，就在这时，Terence 和Chingju 不知在玩什么，拿了笔一直往我的腰按，第一次，我当他们是不小心的，但第二次，我不懂做什么，我火起来了，突然转过身去瞪着他们，过后翻回来时，不懂为什么无意中落下了一两颗眼泪（或许你看了会觉得我懦弱，因为一个男生不应该那么容易就落泪吧），过后我赶快擦干，不希望别人看到，幸好真的没人看到。下课，我一样去duty，duty回来，看见桌上贴着，一张纸，上面写了一些东西，不过当时我已经准备开始癫了，但真的还是要谢谢你啦，你真的帮了我很多。

有！但说不出口…………

2008-09-29T18:50:00.002+08:00

今天早上很迟起床因为是补假，（其实很早起，但死睡，赖着床不肯起床），然后大概10点左右，哥哥叫我教他怎样用Movie Maker，因为他要用来做SPM ART。反正也是没事做，就拿张椅子，坐去他的旁边，一边教他，一边给他意见。大概做到1点多，总算做完了。过后，就吃午饭。吃完午饭后，突然间家里的电话响起了，打找Mr.Yap。我便拿给爸爸，但不是找他的，原来是找哥哥的，他接了电话后……笑了。原来是他申请的大学接受他了，还拿到奖学金，明年1月就开课了，意思说，今年12月就要走了。真的，虽然不像我说的话，但真的我很不舍得。明年开始，没人陪我打球，没人在我有问题时给我意见了。明年开始，家里就会空了许多。想起来，时间真的过得好快，十年前，我们好在家里玩追逐，一年前，两个人在没有父母的陪同下，飞到欧洲三个星期……时间真的过得好…快……好快。过了12月，要见他就得等多至少两年。说到两年，两年后，不知道我会在那里，澳洲？加拿大？UK?K.K?还是正在斗湖准备到外国读书？我真的不知道…………我不想那么早走，我不舍得我的朋友们，正如我哥哥那样，一走肯定就是几年，会到来，都应该变完了。haiz.....PMR剩下两个星期，想不了这么多，PMR和统考最后的冲刺……

变了……

2008-09-24T13:59:00.002+08:00

每当我插入你们当中，我尽力的想和你们谈天但你们总是把我当成一个什么都不懂的外人。说句来实话，我也发现我和你们的距离差太越远，完全是两个世界的人，还说什么明年为了你们我会怎样怎样……我看那是不可能的了，就当我食言吧！融入你们我真的没话题好讲。或许你们觉得我变了，变得和以前不同，也或许你们觉得我重色轻友，但我也不打算解释，因为这只会越摸越黑。假如你们觉得我变了，请当面跟我说我做错什么，不要只会在我后面说。假如你们还要在我背后说我的坏话，算了，这份友情也不值得挽留……或许我们真的属于不同世界的人（我知道我打这篇东西会得罪很多人，我在这里说声对不起）

看不见的未来！

2008-09-04T20:24:00.002+08:00

最近这几天，我的心情很不好，从来没试过那么乱。这几天，那些从我嘴里跑出来的笑声，其实是勉强的，我实在找不回以前那些无忧无虑的心情。可能是压力，但也很可能是我升学的问题。最近，常听爸妈和哥哥讨论升学的问题。不知不觉就说到我的头上来，haiz.........明明看见了一条路，但在爸妈兴奋的讨论下...东说一点，西说一点，越说越离谱.......haiz.......虽然我不是完全懂，但也不用把我当成什么都不懂。虽然，我无权作决定，但至少我有权发问，也不至于我一开口问就把我骂个狗血淋头，再不然就ngam我一整天。暂时，我听到最离谱的是读完初三就把我送去K.K读什么International School，不过幸好那只是个提议。Haiz...........就算真的要走，我觉得我超不舍得这里的一却，这里的每一个人。为什么，我们没有选择权？！？！？！？！！！？？

迷失了自我

2008-09-01T18:19:00.002+08:00

时不时想起来，总觉得我应该怎么做……其实不是迷失了自我，而是有目标但力不从心！各种的压力困扰着我，我到底应该做什么，应该怎么做？为什么我做的东西总是比不上别人的，问题肯定出现在我身上，如果说是五六次的失败可能对我只是成为下一次让我参考的经验，但这不是五六次了，我的心，说句真话，是开始灰了，脑力出现了想放弃的念头…………你们是怎么做到的，是运气吗？还是实力？也许我没那种实力，但我却不希望别人向我伸出援手，我希望我可以靠自己！我想试着为自己克服困难。说到伸出援手，我马上就想起我们初三党，我相信在我们那几个人之间的友谊是稳固的，是可以百分百地互相信任的！我们是一群可以共同进退的朋友，有福同享，有难同当，一起分担，一起开心。希望不是我一个人在自high啦，我希望彼此之间也有这种感觉…………

压力……………

2008-08-25T21:51:00.002+08:00

今天，我早上很迟到校，所以没去课室就把书包放在后台等周会完了才背着回课室……回课室的路上，看见几个学长在physics lab帮杨文宇搬灯笼，我们当然不错过着偷懒的机会啦！=,=''' 过后，第一节下课，我和Plato去收音响，我们边走边谈，突然Plato说到PMR剩下一个月。哇！我才好像大梦初醒，那种庞大的压力突然间来……我好像没做出任何准备，心里一直在想接下来的一个半月我要怎么度过。另外，在Scout身为组长的我压力也不小，Mak ko 要我们每一组都参与那个灯笼比赛，哇朋友！我们还有一个月就要考试了，你叫我们去忙那个灯笼比赛，还说交不出灯笼的那组，组长的课外活动分会被扣五分。天哪！说到买灯笼我第一流，可做灯笼我确实是第九流………我完全不知道要从哪里起步，要买什么材料，要多少材料。

花花手

2008-08-19T20:05:00.002+08:00

哇！我的手实在是“花”。每当弄到水，或汗就感到刺痛。但想起来就一个爽字。经过干部训练营后，我们留校去帮红心的搭Camp。Fui Siong 就建议要搭一个Tower，然后我们就发觉我们的竹不够，于是我们就决定进kabota的树林里砍。walaiwer..r.我们那树林里的蚊子啊，真的是好凶，好凶，进去30分钟出来就变成木乃伊了。过了树林是一大片草丛，草丛更geng哦！别看那草整一个人那么高！踩下去积水到我们的大腿。我们过不去…………最后我们想到一个办法，就是把草压下来，才在草的上面，水才没有酱深。我们的花花手就是这样弄成的。最后，我们在里面砍了6条竹，抬出来。

YES!!!!我终于做出了决定…………

2008-08-11T21:03:00.003+08:00

今天，考完试后，在我“肥妈妈”的陪同下，走去办公室，敲了校长的门，并告诉校长。“我不能成为组长，因为我在16号那天，scout有一年一度的考试。”感觉上心里有点过意不去。我从以一个健言社身份的参与者，变成了scout 的身份。其实，我在做这个决定时，我想了很久。从初一到初三，我只有把scout放在第一位，放弃健言社，唉………对不起…。还有…………我还想对一个人说声对不起，虽然我知道你很生气我放你飞机，真的很对不起，我无法履行我答应过你的事，我做出的选择应该是在没有办法中，最好的办法了。也许是你一直高估了我的能力吧……但是你可以选择相信或不相信，我会继续帮你想办法……唉除了对不起还是对不起…………

好想好想

2008-08-09T21:48:00.003+08:00

这个假期有一个干部训练营，正好撞到我们scout 的Maju Hiking, 其实我很想参加这个Hiking，因为他实在很有挑战性。虽然我已经pass liao hiking 但………………其实我还没有做出选择，到底要放弃哪一个…………到底谁可以给我意见………………唉！！！！！

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2008-08-02T20:09:00.001+08:00

今天，我的心情很糟糕！！可能当中得罪了很多人，在这里我想对他们说声对不起！虽然如此，有某些人是真的很过分。我很想知道，为什么他的妒忌心要这么重？ok!就算不是妒忌，那又何必讲那么伤人的话？？说句老实话，刚开始我觉得他是一个值得我信赖的一个朋友，但自从那句话后，我简直不想在他面前跟他多说一句话，多看他一眼…………